Lucas in the ICU
Lucas in the ICU
by Brian Gourley
Lucas is in the ICU. He had a seizure today He is on a breathing apparatus and under sedation while they figure out if there is anything neurologically and decide when to pull him off of the sedation and remove the breathing tube.
I was expecting to be waiting for Erin to come so we could do our 3 day switch out. We have both had increased anxiety about Lucas since he has been getting sicker and sicker, and I felt like I couldn't leave for 5 minutes without being worried a fever would spike or the BP would go up. This has been going on the past several days.
I walked in at 11am after my daily debrief w doctors, Lucas was still asleep when I left and no fever. My sixth sense was that I needed to get back to the room. When I got there Lucas was in his bed saying he was cold, which happened right before his febrile seizures, the last one he had in April 2017.I was helping him change in the bathroom and he started shaking, then he started convulsing. Then I picked him up and yelled for a doctor and the room filled up with like 15 people.
A tall man walked in the room, very calm, took control He was the ICU doctor, he flew into the room like an Eagle. He was a Chief from another time. This man was calm, cool and collected. I prayed at Lucas feet for him to live, I prayed and held and rubbed his feet and told him all the things I say before he goes to sleep. “Youre the best, I love you, I am proud of you.” We have been saying that before night time.
The nurses and doctors comforted me, they called Erin, when she got there I felt a sigh of relief. A sense of calm almost in her. I know she was terrified, but she didn't look it. I was so proud of her and Lucas at that moment. We held hands, we prayed, we tried not to let the fear in.
They took him down for a CT scan and there ws no blood on his brain, prayer answered. Then they did and EEG and he wasnt seizing any further according to the neurologist.
At one point today, when we were both praying over Lucas I felt a cradling hand of God, like a palm holding him up in my prayer. I kept praying. The darkness came in, but I prayed, Erin prayed, we just prayed. Held each other and held Lucas in our cocoon. Erin whispered to him her mommy prayers and I tried to support her while she did and she did the same for me. We were there for Lucas.
I am asking all of you to be there for Lucas tonight, tomorrow, this week, as we pray for these things
That there is nothing wrong with his brain or his spine that could have caused the seizure
That this was a febrile seizure, and that tomorrow whatever they find is not serious and they can take out his breathing lines and he can go back to being with mommy and daddy and focus on beating cancer, sports and Legos.
That his marrow they take on Thursday has him in remission from this cancer
I pray for Lucas to have no more seizures
Pray for God to continue to hold him in his hand, to cradle him with his strength and spirit and hold him close to the light.
By Erin Gourley
Lucas was day 20 of round 2 of chemo. Lucas, also, has had 3 lumber punctures (LP’s) with 3 spinal chemos injected the past few weeks. While we initially did not think there was cancer in his spine, their machine detected molecular cancer cells which isn’t good. So they are doing another LP this week (depending on the results of the neurology) with more chemo in the spine.
Initially, the first 10 days Lucas was acting fine throwing the football in the atrium, walking around. But the past 10 days we’ve seen the chemo taking effect. He’s had fevers every night starting around 5pm.
He typically wakes up every morning when I’m there and I’ll say ‘how do you feel?’. His answer is always ‘good’. He presses on like a soldier. He does not complain. And he has such a contagious sense of humor and feisty spirit. The cleaning crew even know this kid and ask me daily ‘how's our boy is doing?’.
My cousin Linda kindly gave Lucas her team 1984 Vintage Celtics jacket from when she worked for them. In her note to Lucas she wrote about how she was relentless in getting the job. She wrote Red the President of the Celtics every week. Her message to Lucas was that he, too, is a relentless fighter and will beat this!! Lucas asked me a lot about what ‘relentless’ means. I explained to him that we don’t give up, we fight and push on until we succeed just as he will do as we get the black cells out of his body. Sweet angel he gets that the black cells need to go so he can get DD’s good cells. I told him DD said ‘I’m going to give Lucas my bones so he’s not sick any more’. He loved that :)
Our prayers:
I pray that Lucas is cured and healed forever so he can go forth to live a long healthy happy life. He is a mighty spirit and soul and inspires me daily. xo
